The new series of Spooks is even more bonkers than ever. But it's still a brilliant rollercoaster, says Sam Wollaston
Spooks series blog: series nine, episode six
You may be interested to hear what happens when someone experiences technological difficulties here at the Guardian. A frozen screen, lost file, that kind of thing. So you call the IT department. And one of the nice people will ask some questions in order to diagnose the problem, then they'll say they're going to take control of the computer remotely from wherever they are (the basement I imagine, like in The IT Crowd). It's quite weird, seeing your cursor moving around the screen without you doing anything. Like some one's taken over your mind.
Not interesting? The same where you are? I only mention it because something similar happens in this episode of Spooks (BBC1). But it's not the MI5 IT department moving the cursor around Harry and the team's screens. Nor are they searching for a three-quarters finished but totally unsaved television review. This is a Chinese-Russian alliance of cyber-hackers and it's after classified information: state secrets, information about troop movements, that kind of thing. The enemy is intent on causing maximum damage.
So, desperately trying to keep the MI5/my workplace parallel alive, it's as if the IT departments of the Times and the Independent have successfully hacked into our system and now control Guardian computers. They're undermining our integrity by typing gibberish interspersed with rude words, then sending it off to our printers. (What do you mean you've long thought that was already happening? Cheeky.) And they've locked down the building so we can't get out to tell the world what's going on. Look up at the second floor: that's me at the window, holding up a piece of paper. "DON'T BELIEVE OUR LIES" it says.
Here the two paths – ours and MI5's – diverge. Because what we don't have lying around the office at Kings Place is an old bomb that can be recommissioned and used to blast our way out (well, security editor Richard Norton-Taylor probably does, but he's not in today, and his drawer's locked). The Spooks dudes do though, and are able to escape their prison, then locate and capture the enemy. And the west is saved from defeat in the cyber war.
It wasn't going well up to that point. The Taliban had already hacked into allied networks, figured out how to make US drones perform U-turns in mid-air and attack the bases they'd just left (you'll soon be able to read about it on WikiLeaks). This was due to discrepancies in the American and British operating systems – they'd upgraded to Windows 7, we were still on 3.1. But if you can do this from a cave in the Afghan mountains, imagine what a collaboration between China and Russia could have achieved. The security of the free world was looking seriously compromised. But in the end, even in these hi-tech times, what won the day was a good dollop of old-fashioned British pluck. Hurrah!
I don't do Spooks religiously any more. These days I just drop in from time to time, usually to find that someone I used to like is no longer there, most probably neutralised (bayonet protocol, data five, as Harry says when he's authorising a kill). Plus it's increasingly unclear whose side Lucas is on. And the whole thing is even more bonkers than it was before. It doesn't really matter though; it's still bloody good fun, a buttock-clenching roller-coaster. The music's so good too. If you had it for your ringtone would your life immediately become more exciting and glamorous? Only one way to find out.
Horizon: Miracle Cure? A Decade of the Human Genome (BBC2) has a different, deeper and more real kind of urgency to it. The documentary assesses how much progress has been made in finding treatments for genetic diseases since the decoding of the human genome 10 years ago. But it's given a whole lot of extra personal potency because the three people doing the investigating have genetic disorders themselves. So it's not just a case of: "Tell us about this interesting research you're doing." It's more along the lines of: "Any idea when you may have figured out how to diffuse this ticking time bomb I've got round my neck?" Especially for Sophie, who has cystic fibrosis and whose lungs will pack up in the not-too-distant future. She does a brilliant job, finding out about mutated genes and how it will be possible to insert healthy genes into cells, how gene therapy is already being used to treat other condictions. And all the time inside she must be shouting – gasping – get a bloody move on.